The Orchard House

24 Funny, Crazy, Inappropriate, & Jaw Dropping Wedding Stories!

What happened at your wedding?!?!

Weddings can be a source of a lot of stress and some crack under the pressure. Others just seem to enjoy reeking havoc every where they go. We recently searched the Google for some crazy, funny, and unbelievable wedding stories. We thought it would be fun to switch things out a bit and look at the lighter side of weddings. In this blog, we are going to share some of the best wedding stories we could find!


  • 50% of my RSVP’s never showed to my wedding and my brother-in-law promised to DJ and capture video of my ceremony, and other wedding highlights. When he showed up to the wedding he didn’t have any DJ equipment or a video camera. Thanks buddy!
  • The best man’s toast caused the groom’s family a lot of pain and they no longer speak to him after his speech included a story about the groom (Mike) being incredibly selfish. He shared a story about the bachelor party and how they hired hookers, but Mike got 3 because he’s so selfish.
  • My wedding venue called me 2 weeks before my wedding to advise they double booked my date. They then asked me if I could pick a new wedding date.
  • The maid-of-honor’s toast included story about her and the bride, and a road trip they took. She told a story about they picked up a hobo with an apparent foot fetish – took him to a seedy motel and proceeded to take turns having sex with him.
  • The best man delivered a speech that included a story about how the bride took his virginity. As he shared this story he burst out into tears. The best man was in a wheelchair, so violence didn’t erupt, but the groom’s father loaded him into a taxi and told him to “get lost.”
  • The father-of-the-bride gave the groom’s friends the wrong directions to the reception in a blatant attempt to keep them from coming to the wedding.
  • Prior to the wedding, the bride and groom were to have a baby. Unfortunately, there complications and the baby died at birth. During the best man’s speech, he told dead baby jokes and was immediately kicked out the wedding.
  • Got drunk, complained about the food, felt up the bride, and got stuck in a stall in the ladies room. And this was the father of the groom.

The Orchard House

  • My Uncle, also our wedding photographer, fell through a wall because he was so drunk. He also forgot to put a memory card in the camera so none of our reception pictures came out.
  • A photographer was so enamored with the maid-of-honor, that 50% of the photos taken were of her. There were 0 pictures of just the bride and groom.
  • My cousin, who thinks he’s a wedding photographer because he has a nice camera, photographed my wedding. He showed up 2 hours late and got so drunk at the reception, none of our pictures came out.
  • My husband’s friend took his girlfriend into the bathroom with one of our disposable cameras and documented their “activity.” My mother almost died when she had them developed as a surprise for us.
  • The photographer that photographed my parent’s wedding promised to deliver their photos in a few weeks. 22 years later and they still don’t have a single picture.
  • A hot summer wedding in a church with no air conditioning. All the windows were open as the soloist was singing with a booming operatic voice. A fly went into her mouth. The song ended.
  • The DJ played the wrong music during our wedding ceremony. Our guests were treated to “The Lady Is A Tramp.”
  • The groom’s ex-wife stood in the back of the church yelling “not” as the pastor read Corinthians 13.
  • My college roommate asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. After accepting her offer, she proceeded to tell me which dress I would be required to purchase – it was $2,400! After finding an identical dress for a fraction of the price, I asked her if I could just wear this one. She refused and insisted I get a credit card to pay for it. When I refused, she kicked me out of the wedding and we haven’t spoken since.
  • The bride, also my sister, asked all of her bridesmaids to gain 10-20 pounds so she looked better in comparison.
  • My mother got completely trashed and showed up to our honeymoon suite wearing nothing but a bathmat. She climbed into our bed and threw up in our garbage can. Don’t do that.
  • The mother-of-the-groom felt he made a mistake my marrying his wife, so she spent the entire night trying to convince the attractive female servers at the venue to have sex with her son and tell him about his mistake.
  • The cake topper was a bride with her wedding dress hiked up to her hips straddling the groom. Classy.
  • Our officiant made several jokes during his speech about my wife used to date one of my groomsman.
  • The best man dropped the bomb during his toast that the groom wasn’t the father of the pregnant’s bride’s baby.
  • During the reception, the bride was so intoxicated she slid under the head table and performed an act on her husband. Later that night, the bride was spotted in the hotel lobby passed out cold. The top of her dress was pulled down with her lady business hanging out of her vomit stained wedding dress. My date and I went to the groomsmen’s hotel room where the groom and his friends were shooting heroin, while the bride lay naked on the bed out cold.
  • As professional wedding photographers, we are essentially hired to observe, capture, and document. Not all weddings have crazy stories, but we have seen some interesting things.